Stop all presses! I found the problem!
Since the previous owner of the car has ghetto-modded pretty much all the engine electronics to the car, he stripped open the jacket around the distributor signal wires.
Log:
(Vehicle is a 1989 Subaru Justy with a earlier generation engine. Distributor part.no. is 22100KA170 )
The reason I even disassembled the dist in the first place, were because the wires were old, stiff and broken insulation at some points.
Installed new wires (soldered the wires to the cable shoes to make good, secure contact) and super-glued the cap-to-dist seal on the aluminium (the seal were falling apart anyway).
I put new cable shoes onto the other ends of the signal-wires and put male and female connectors on the black and white wires from the car harness so that the could be no mix-up. (Remember this...)
I assembled the dist and mounted in in the car and hoped for a start - niet, nada, nothing. :S
After a few disassembly/reassemblys, I broke the sensor (luckily, only the plastic).
I used epoxy resin to glue the sensor together again, and used a Dremel grinder to remove the excess glue.
Re-attached the sensor, reinstalled the dist. -> nothing.
WTF...?
After this, I went back to basics by opening the valve cover, setting cyl. 1 to TDC-CS to verify all the mechanical aspects of the problem were ruled out.
Engine still refuses to start.
Sledgehammer feels invitive, but luckily, I'm a suborn man.
Last thought going through my head were the sensor wires, and I swapped them with some help from my father.
HEUREKA! Engine starts at first compression!!!
Never thought that a coil could have a polarity, since a standard lightbulb (AC or DC) doesn't, and a coil isn't much different, at least not in my head. Proven wrong.
Thank you all for helping, especially Armageddous.
Can a moderator pin this? Would be great for future info-seekers.